Human Touch

I was driving today to go visit my grandmother who is in a nursing home. The song I Can't Live A Day by the Contemporary Christian group Avalon came on. These are the opening words: "I could live life alone/ and never feel the longings of my heart/ the healing warmth of someone's arms/ and I could live without dreams/ and never know the thrill of what could be/ with every star so far and out of reach/ I could live without many things and I could carry on/ but I couldn't face my life tomorrow without your hope in my heart/ I know I can't live a day without you...." The phrase in particular that hooked me was "the healing warmth of someone's arms".

I have had a recurring thought at various times in my life and I cannot tell you why. And oddly, I had it again recently. The thought is this: I cannot remember the last time I actually touched someone.

I am not just talking about intimate touch, but even the casual brush against a stranger in an elevator or the social handshake. Maybe if you are married, it is impossible to go a day without touching your spouse, with at least a goodbye kiss in the morning or a goodnight kiss before bed. But as a single person, it is a strange realization to me, when I actually have it, that it has been days or weeks since I can recall touching another human being. There generally is no emotional reaction to this thought, it just comes as a realization.

I remember writing a report in college on the power of human touch. This has been an issue of interest to me for at least that long, as far as I can remember. I can't recall many of the conclusions of the paper, except for the fact that here is incredible "healing power" in human touch, to reference even the song. This can not be exaggerated enough. There is not only healing power, but living power in human touch. This was confirmed to me when I worked in child welfare and experienced the ramifications of child abuse and the amazing "ability" of an infant to actually die if it is starved of human touch.

To respond to the lines of the song quoted above, I don't think I can live without that list of things, nor do I believe God intended us to. This does not lessen the comparable value of knowing God. Whereas, confessing those lines actually denies that God designed us to be in community, or relationship. A handshake, a hug, a high-five, a hand on the shoulder, or a pat on the back. All these gestures may communicate different things, but they all share one thing in common: physical human touch. Just consider the significance of holding a person's hand who is lying in the hospital, whether sick or just elderly. I am a relatively clean person, yet I have had periods of my life where I am aware of missing human touch. Consider what a homeless person or a shut-in or a widow woman or a prisoner may experience.